Near one of the entrances of a modern high-rise building, a car stopped. An elderly woman walking along the driveway began to complain loudly and even swung her cane at the car.
“They park like this everywhere, there’s nowhere to step.”
She would have kept complaining, but then a charming young man jumped out of the car. He smiled at her kindly.
“Don’t worry, grandma, I’m just going to move the car now. I’m just dropping off my wife. She’s pregnant. As a woman, you should understand.”
The man smiled once again and rushed to the front door of the car. He opened it and offered his hand to his wife. She stepped out like a queen, pushing her huge belly forward. However, the grandmother with the cane did not soften. She furrowed the remains of her gray eyebrows angrily and began to mutter, pretending to talk to herself, but loud enough for the pregnant woman and her husband to hear.
“Pregnant, she says! We milked cows and carried buckets of milk until the very birth back in the collective farm days. Now they praise pregnancy as if it’s a disease. It’s a perfectly natural process.”
The pregnant woman snorted contemptuously at the old lady’s muttering. She stopped near the entrance to wait while her husband moved the car to the parking spot. The pregnant woman’s name was Liza, and she did not want to take an extra step without her husband. She never said “I’m pregnant,” only “we are pregnant.” She made her husband think that way, too. They both wanted the child equally and planned it together. Now they went to the maternity clinic together, everywhere together. They knew it would be a boy and had already decided on a name. Still, there was one point on which the couple could never agree. Even now, on the way home from their parents, they argued about it in the car. Liza could not convince Dima and planned to continue the conversation once they got upstairs.
Dmitry locked the car and quickly returned to his wife so as not to keep her waiting. He took her arm gently and led her to the elevator. Since Liza’s belly began to show, he treated her like a fragile porcelain vase. The life growing inside his wife was a real miracle for the man. He went to the maternity clinic with Liza and looked at the ultrasound monitor with reverence. Dmitry always carried a photo of his future son in his breast pocket.
By all signs, Dmitry should become a wonderful father. He was already a great husband. He opened the apartment door for Liza, dropped to his knees without any embarrassment, and began to take off her sandals. It was the right thing to do—Liza had trouble bending down, the belly got in the way. And it wasn’t hard for him at all.
Yet, Dmitry could not be called a “wimp” or weak. He was valued at work, respected by friends, and his wife was his favorite person. Dmitry eagerly wondered who their future son would resemble. He hoped he would look like Liza.
Dmitry took off his wife’s sandals and hurried to the kitchen to boil water for tea. His parents had fed them well. Now he just wanted tea. He brewed Liza some herbal tea that her grandmother had sent from the village. The aroma filled the whole apartment.
Liza came into the kitchen, sat on a chair, stretched her slightly swollen legs, and looked strictly at her husband.
“Dima, we haven’t finished talking. Don’t try to dodge the subject and distract me with your tea. I think you should be present at the birth.”
“Liza, what birth?” Dmitry exclaimed, setting the cup in front of his wife. “You know very well that when they take blood from my vein, I turn away. I can’t watch. And now the birth! I don’t want to! I can’t and won’t.”
“You can!” Liza said firmly. “You must. Your child will be born. I don’t want to be alone at such a moment. You have to be there like all responsible husbands. You must hold my hand and see how hard it will be for me to bring your son into this world.”
“Liza, I already know it’s hard and very painful. That’s exactly why I don’t want to see it. I’ll be with you, well, somewhere there, in the hallway, behind the door.”
“No, no again!” the young woman snapped.
This argument between them hadn’t started yesterday. It had lasted about a month since some girlfriend told Liza how her husband valued her more after being present at the birth.
Dima was puzzled. How could he value her more? He already did. He loved and valued Liza. But no matter what she said, being present at the birth was something beyond him.
The tea in front of Liza was getting cold, and she kept pushing her point, driving her husband to despair. The evening ended with the man promising to think about it. For Liza, this meant capitulation. Until then, Dmitry was very categorical. If he promised to think about it, it meant he was giving in.
But Dmitry was not exactly surrendering; he planned to think and consult. The day after work, he went to his brother, who had three children. Being a father of many, Dmitry’s older brother, Vadim, had never been present at the births. Honestly, Dmitry intended to consult not with Vadim but with his wife, Olya.
The brother and his wife lived in a cottage in a big noisy house. Hyperactive children ran all over, but neither Olya nor Vadim minded at all. Olya was a friendly person, always smiling and looking at the children’s antics with a smile.
“Let them be wild. They’ll outgrow it,” she said. “When else to play but in childhood?”
Vadim supported his wife and never scolded the children. Dmitry envied their patience. He liked visiting, though after some time the noise gave him a headache. The first thing he did when arriving was to ask Olya to make him coffee. Dmitry missed this drink terribly, but coffee was harmful to Liza, so they didn’t keep it at home to avoid temptation. Olya understood and turned on the coffee machine. While the cup was filling, Dmitry breathed in the aroma. But he didn’t forget why he came.
“Olya, I have a serious matter. I need advice,” Dmitry said, trying to outshout the children running into the kitchen playing tag.
“Got it,” she nodded. Told her husband: “Vadim, get them out of here so I can talk quietly with your brother.”
Dmitry sighed when Vadim sent the children out and closed the door.
“Listen, here’s the thing: Liza insists on partner birth.”
“What’s that? Partner birth?” Vadim scratched his head.
“How so?” Olga laughed, putting a steaming cup of coffee in front of Dmitry. “Liza wants her husband to be present at the moment she gives birth.”
“Wow,” Vadim’s eyes widened. “Is she crazy? I wouldn’t want that.”
“Neither would I,” Olya said. “So I gave birth to all our troublemakers alone. Even if you had offered, I would have refused. I didn’t want you to see me like that—distorted, sweaty, and screaming like a slaughtered pig. But people are different. So Liza thinks otherwise. What’s the problem, Dima? If you don’t want to, tell her.”
“Do you think I don’t?” Dmitry shouted, burning himself with coffee. “I keep saying the same thing like a parrot. I don’t want to, I’m scared. But Liza is stubborn to the point of scandal. She even convinced her mother. My mother-in-law calls me several times a day asking what kind of husband I am if I won’t support my wife in a difficult moment. Olya, you gave birth to three, tell me what to do? How to convince her?”
“I don’t even know what to say,” Olya shook her head. “Bring her to us; I’ll try myself. I’ll tell her how awful women look giving birth. Maybe that will influence her. And if not, Dima, be flexible. Don’t refuse her flat out. You can’t upset a pregnant woman at this stage. Try to cheat. Say you agree. And when the time comes, lie that you’re sick. Sore throat, fever. They won’t let you into the delivery room with those symptoms.”
Dmitry thought about it. He liked the advice and decided to use it. Although there was still a chance Olya could convince Liza. The next day Dmitry took his wife to visit his brother. The hope was in vain. No matter how Olya tried, Liza stood her ground. For Liza, it was already a matter of principle.
Well, Dmitry had no choice but to agree. They even filled out the necessary papers. Though the cost of partner birth was not pleasant. But what wouldn’t you do for the peace of mind of the expectant mother? Liza calmed down. Having won her husband’s consent, she became like a gentle kitten.
The labor began suddenly, a week earlier than expected. It happened in the evening. Telling himself not to panic, Dmitry grabbed the prepared bag and took Liza to the maternity hospital. He forgot to pretend to be sick and only remembered when they were already arriving. Liza seemed to read his thoughts. Crying out in pain and clutching his shoulder with thin fingers, she moaned:
“Dima, you promised! You must be there. Don’t even think of making up an excuse to run away. I’ll know it’s on purpose. Don’t leave me, be near.”
That’s how Dmitry found himself in the delivery room. Pale, wrapped in a medical gown, with a cap on his head and a mask on his face, he fearfully looked away, afraid to even watch what was happening. And Liza screamed! She screamed so much! She reached out to Dmitry, grabbed him, leaving bloody semicircles from her nails on his wrist.
Dmitry tried to pull himself together, really tried. He even breathed in unison with Liza, the way she needed at that moment. It seemed to work, but for some reason his consciousness began to fade. The child had just appeared when Dmitry completely lost consciousness and collapsed in a faint.
“Another hopeless dad,” the doctor sneered.
So, without meaning to, Dmitry kept the promise he made to his wife. Though it didn’t end as planned. Liza was displeased. But she had no reason to blame her husband. The boy was born without the father’s gaze but was born nonetheless—a pretty, healthy baby.
Next came a pleasant discharge from the maternity hospital. Balloons, flowers. Sweet grandmothers rushing to help Liza with the baby. At first, one of the two grandmothers was always on duty at Dmitry and Liza’s apartment. They took turns, and the couple was hardly alone. Amid all this hustle and bustle, Dmitry at first didn’t realize the change in himself. Or rather, not in himself. Dmitry’s attitude towards Liza changed. God knows he didn’t want it, but he could no longer look at his wife with the same love he had before the birth. She was no longer an object of desire for him. Something changed. Dmitry began to see Liza only as the mother of his child. He loved his son very much. But his wife…
Liza didn’t realize this right away. Everything seemed fine. Dmitry was always nearby, helped with the baby, participated in everything. The young mother only noticed when the child was about five months old. Suddenly she thought about how Dmitry, who moved to sleep on the couch in the first days not to disturb her rest, never returned to the bed. She couldn’t remember the last time her husband hugged or kissed her, let alone anything else… Dmitry didn’t even hint or ask when it would be possible.
Liza decided to arrange a romantic evening for her husband. She escaped from the house, bought herself a stunning negligee that revealed more than it concealed. She put the baby to sleep and lit candles in the bedroom. Dmitry gave a completely different reaction than Liza expected. He understood everything but just frowned.
“Liza, not tonight. I’m so tired. My head hurts.”
“What’s going on, Dima? What do you mean ‘tired’? We hadn’t been intimate since before the birth. You couldn’t wait for when it would be possible. What’s happening? Do you have someone else?”
“No, Liza, I swear, no!”
Dmitry swore, and it was true. Physically he had no one else, but mentally…
The young man often caught himself looking at other women. They interested him as the opposite sex. But he felt nothing like that for Liza. How to explain this to her? Liza didn’t believe him and was outraged.
“Dima, prove to me you’re not cheating. Come here!”
She hugged her husband, kissed him, pressed her whole body against him. He froze like a statue and didn’t even try to hug her back. He wanted to overcome himself but couldn’t. When Liza hugged him, something clicked in his head, and he remembered the moment in the delivery room. What he saw just before fainting.
Dmitry finally understood he would never be able to look at his wife as a woman again. Something inside him flipped, broke, and probably could not be fixed.
After that, the family began to fall apart. Liza sulked and didn’t speak to her husband for months. When she came to her senses, she tried again to arrange romantic evenings. She took care of herself and began to look magnificent. Even better than when they first met. And nothing…
No, Dmitry treated her well. But certainly not as a wife. More like a relative. That’s what he said after a year:
“Liza, you will never become a stranger to me. You are the mother of my son, whom I love very much. Yet, I cannot stay in this marriage. When you asked if I had someone else, I honestly said no, I didn’t. Then I wasn’t lying. But I am a man, with all that entails… You have to understand. Now I couldn’t answer you like that. Honestly, I see no point in keeping this marriage. Twisting, lying, and running around on the side. Nothing will change here, I’ve tried, I swear. I can’t treat you as a woman anymore. You just don’t attract me like that. I will leave myself, leave you the apartment with our son. I will pay alimony and help as much as I can. I hope you won’t interfere with me seeing our child.”
“Dima, you can’t do that,” Liza cried. “Everything was fine between us. All my girlfriends envied our family. I love you, I don’t want a divorce. Maybe we could see a psychologist?”
“It won’t help,” the man shook his head. “I clearly told you I have someone else. I didn’t want this, but it happened. I constantly think about her, strive to be with her. It was like that with you once, before…”
“How I made you be present at the birth,” Liza finished for him, crying. “God, if only I knew how much I regret it! I never thought it would turn out like this. I thought it would bring us closer. Dima, tell me why other men don’t lose love for their wives after being present at birth? Why are you different?”
And so the seemingly strong and loving family fell apart. Six months later, Dmitry remarried. He had two children in his new marriage but kept his word and never forgot his first son. The child spent weekends with him.
Liza married two more times. Both marriages failed. She never managed to forget Dmitry. She spent her whole life searching for a husband like him. She searched but never found.
