Dina shook off her house robe, jumped into slippers on her bare feet, and rushed out of the apartment building, trying to catch up to her husband.
«Pasha, come back! Where are you going?» she yelled almost in tears after him.
Pavel, annoyed, responded over his shoulder:
«I can’t stand being around you right now, I’m going fishing!»
«You run off to this ‘fishing’ every day! Tell me, what’s her name, your ‘fishing’?» Dina cried out through tears.
«Stupid,» snapped Pavel, loudly slamming his car door and quickly driving off, intending to hide as far away as possible.
Ignoring the autumn chill and the neighbors who stretched out of their windows hoping for more drama, Dina burst into tears.
«Din, why are you sitting on the ground? You’ll freeze! What happened?» next to her sat down her school friend Lusya, who was returning from the store with heavy bags and stopped by.
«Pasha wants to leave me,» Dina said through sobs.
«Why would you think that?» asked Lusya, surprised, widening her eyes.
«We often fight for no reason, and then he immediately goes fishing,» complained Dina. «Today I just suggested going with me to a healer, Marfa. I found her contact on the internet. They say she’s a hereditary witch, and many stars turn to her for help. The reviews about her work are positive.»
«Dear, you’re not a child. To believe internet reviews? They can be bought for pennies! Be offended if you want, but you are only harming yourself. Why make a scene?» Lusya reproached her.
Dina sobbed again:
«It’s easy for you to say, you have children, two of them, and I have none and maybe never will.»
«And is Pavel pressuring you because of this?»
«No, he says we will live, that he loves me…»
«Well, you see, he has long accepted this, why then do you throw tantrums every day?»
«You just don’t understand, Luda. Today he says this, but what about a year or two from now? If you could see how he interacts with his nephews. He’s run off to fish again, I sense something is wrong.»
«Din, think positively, don’t attract trouble. Come on, warm up and calm down. Winter is coming, you’ll catch a cold,» Lusya gently nudged her shivering friend.
«Let me catch a cold, so what. I’ll die, and Pasha will be better off without me,» Dina continued her lament through tears, not stopping crying.
«Din, you’re acting like a foolish child. It’s called ‘cutting off your nose to spite your face.’ Let’s go home, stop pretending to be miserable. Even a saint wouldn’t endure such scenes,» said Luda, irritably pushing Dina a bit harder.
«Understand, Luda, I’m sure I’m right. Pasha has found someone else and runs to her,» said Dina, reluctantly rising from the bench. She knew what she was saying.
Suspecting Pavel of deceit after his constant «fishing trips,» Dina decided to expose his attempts to evade. Like a true detective, she bought a recorder. And this time, while her husband was busy in the storeroom, looking for a fishing rod, she secretly placed the device in his backpack, managing to turn it on.
«Think I’ll keep believing in this ‘fishing’ after every fight? I’m not going to be fooled,» she decided.
What to do if the unpleasant truth comes out, Dina did not yet know, but with the feeling that she was constantly being deceived, she could no longer reconcile. Sitting at home and sipping tea, she began to torment herself with doubts.
«Maybe I’m exaggerating? Or, on the contrary, I’m not mistaken?» she thought, dipping her spoon into the cherry jam.
In the summer, she and Pavel went to the village, to his parents’ house, and picked a whole bucket of cherries. Right there, in the summer kitchen, she cooked this jam.
The aroma of the jam reminded her of the summer, the green of the fields, and something elusive—perhaps the scent of happiness. Dina remembered how pleasant they were together. But later, back in the city, she learned from doctors that she could not become a mother. Her world collapsed.
«Now it’s all over, Pasha will leave me, find a young and beautiful one to be happy with,» was the first thing that came to her mind.
However, Pavel hugged her and assured her that it did not matter, that they could be happy without children, and that there were many orphans who needed parents. He also said that she was very dear to him.
Although Pavel spoke encouraging words, she barely heard them, as the constant thought pounded in her head: «He will leave you.» Love for her husband and the fear of losing him pushed her to folly. In any domestic situation, Dina felt that she could now be treated with contempt, as she was «an empty shell.»
At the beginning of her whims, Pavel tried to pacify her, made excuses. This began to please Dina—she got a taste for it. Now any oversight—a forgotten loaf of bread, an unmade call, a slight delay—required apologies from Pavel, which did not always help. As a result, after such incidents, there followed trips to fishing.
Eventually, Pavel got tired of it all, and, hearing another tantrum, he simply gathered his gear and left. After Pasha disappeared all night, Dina greeted him in the morning with a slightly guilty smile. She accepted his catch without words and avoided mentioning yesterday’s quarrels. Pavel realized that he had found a weak spot in his wife’s character. So, after a new emotional conflict, Dina cried out in despair:
«You don’t understand me anymore, Pasha! I’m trying to change something, not just go with the flow, like you. If you really love me, you should come with me to Marfa!»
Dina lost control of herself, and her cry was so loud that the neighbors heard it. Pavel, hoping for a peaceful dinner, threw his spoon in the plate and literally flew out of the kitchen.
This time he returned only in the morning—in scale, but without fish. Without explaining anything, he handed Dina a wet backpack and headed to the bathroom.
«I’ll take a shower, then off to work,» he muttered, settling on the couch, and immediately fell asleep.
Dina slowly unpacked his backpack. Apparently, Pavel had been caught in the rain, and the recorder had stopped working. Rewinding the recording to the beginning, she heard her own voice: «Pasha, come back!» Her own shrill tone embarrassed her. Scrolling further, Dina continued to listen to what happened in the car—but besides music, nothing was heard: no calls, no conversations, no voices.
Finally, after about twenty minutes, Pavel’s voice sounded on the recording:
«Hello, Aunt Galya. How is Dimka feeling? Do you need anything?»
«Hello, Pashenka. Thank you, kind one, but no, nothing will help my boy now, and all that remains is to pray,» the woman answered.
Suddenly, Dina realized that Pavel had traveled to the village to visit his Aunt Galya, whose life had been difficult. She met this woman when she first came there with her husband. Galina Viktorovna was the sister of Pavel’s deceased mother.
Her husband had told her about her tough life: her husband often drank and wandered, and she endured it for their son. Dina learned that Galina sometimes took Dimu to hide from beatings at relatives’ homes.
Later, in the morning, Dina met Pavel’s cousin, Oleg, and his children, Vika and Anton. They were lovely blonde children.
With what tenderness Pasha interacted with his nephews, Dina thought. It turns out his «fishing» was a trip to the village.
Suddenly, a child’s voice sounded from the speakers of the recorder:
«Uncle Pasha, will you take me fishing? I really know how to fish!»
«I want to go too!» Vika cheerfully exclaimed.
Pavel laughed and said:
«Look how many helpers I’ve gathered! But unfortunately, I can’t take you because we’ll scare all the fish away, and there will be nothing left. And it’s too late, time to sleep.»
«Uncle, you always come alone. Don’t you have a wife?» Vika asked.
«Of course, there is, Aunt Dina. You saw her, remember? We came in the summer,» Pavel confirmed.
«Yes, we remember, we remember,» the children chorused. «She’s so beautiful and kind. And do you love her?»
Dina froze, waiting for Pavel to either remain silent or evade the question. But he simply said:
«Of course, I love her very much.» A sigh was heard in his voice. «Only she somehow doesn’t believe it.»
At these words, tears rolled down Dina’s cheeks. She cried from joy, embarrassment, and repentance at the same time.
«How can I be so foolish, destroying my own happiness,» she whispered, hurriedly hiding the recorder.
At that moment, she heard steps behind her. A second later, Pavel entered.
«Din, why are you crying?» he asked, looking into her eyes.
Dina was glad that she had managed to hide the recording and not provoke another quarrel. She turned to him, hugged him, and whispered:
«Forgive me, I’ve really been unreasonable lately.»
«And I should have been more tolerant, but everything was collapsing so quickly,» said Pavel, calming her with gentle touches to her hair. «Did something happen?» he continued.
«Yes, but I didn’t want to bother you. Oleg, my cousin, is now in hospice with cancer. There’s no more hope, and no treatment either,» Pavel explained.
«So, you’ve been visiting him all this time and kept it from me?» Dina asked with some reproach.
«No, not like that. I just didn’t want to add to your worries,» he explained. «Oleg’s family—his mom and kids. I went to them, and I wanted to talk to you about it. If something worse happens to my brother, Vika and Anton will end up in an orphanage. Aunt Galya is ill, and she won’t be able to cope with the children.»
«And where is their mom?» Dina asked.
«Well, it’s complicated. Their mom, Kira, ran off to Spain with a lover,» Pavel replied with a sad voice. «I tried to call her, wrote, but all I heard was ‘no,’ she made it clear that she doesn’t need the children.»
«How is it that those who dream of children get nothing, and those who have them throw them away like an old toy? It’s stupid, unfair. Why is that, Pash?»
«I thought you’d understand,» Pavel began, but Dina interrupted him.
«I know what you’re about, and I agree. If things go badly with Oleg, let’s become a family for Vika and Anton.»
Pavel, smiling, replied:
«I knew you would react like this. You’re the most wonderful.»
Dina, looking up at her husband with tear-filled eyes, said:
«Do you really think so?»
«I’ve never doubted it,» he answered. «Let’s go visit Aunt Galya and the kids next time. They asked about you.»
Dina was about to say that she knew, but caught herself in time, realizing that she needed to keep her guesses to herself.
«Of course, we’ll go this coming weekend.»
But the trip happened sooner. That same evening, Aunt Galya called and, crying, delivered the sad news that Oleg had passed away.
Over time, Pavel and Dina became caring parents to Vika and Anton. Now they had a strong, close-knit family. Galina Viktorovna remained of her opinion and refused a reasonable offer. Despite frequent visits by Dina and Pavel, who offered her to move in with them so she wouldn’t live alone, she was adamant and stayed in her home.
«As long as I have the strength to stand, I will stay here. This is my home, and it is full of memories of my son,» she firmly explained her reason for refusing.
Dina and Pavel, along with the children, often came to visit Oleg’s grave. Pavel, standing by the monument, usually said:
«Well, brother, look at your family. Our children are growing up so wonderfully.»
