For her birthday, Alyona did her hair and makeup: she wanted to look flawless. She suspected that on this special day, Roman would give her something special: she saw a velvet box in his bag when she was taking out the lunch container. And of course, she couldn’t resist peeking inside.
There was a ring. Not just any ring, but one with a diamond (she noticed that on the tag attached to it).
“Could this day really be the one?” she thought, almost on the verge of tears from happiness. After all, she was turning 30, and her mother kept reminding her that time was ticking, but no hordes of suitors were on the horizon. She met Roman in the park. He was walking his dog and sat down on the same bench where Alyona was.
The new acquaintances struck up a conversation, exchanged phone numbers, and Roman started showing interest in Alyona. Everything seemed fine: he worked in IT, didn’t aim for the stars, but made enough to live. The only thing that bothered Alyona was that he was already married.
“I got divorced a year ago. We were married for only three months,” Roman said.
“Why did you get divorced?” “We realized we were different.”
“What didn’t you like about your ex-wife?” Alyona asked cautiously.
“We were opposites. That’s why it was hard to live together. I like to sleep in, she’s an early bird. I love fast food, she prefers fine dining. I listen to hip-hop, she listens to classical music, and so on. But let’s talk about you instead.”
“I’m an owl. And I also love fast food,” Alyona laughed.
“Oh, so we’re perfect for each other.”
“Do you close the toothpaste tube?” she asked, laughing.
“Yes! But there’s one thing: I scatter my socks around.”
“Perfect! Me too.”
The couple quickly realized they were a great match. They decided to move in together.
“Move in with me,” Alyona said when she found out Roman lived with his mother.
“Well, that’s not very manly…”
“It’s fine. Later, we’ll buy a place together…” she dreamed. “But for now, we’ll live like this.”
Roman didn’t think for long and agreed.
The first meeting with the future mother-in-law went quite normally.
“You’ve got a nice little apartment, Alyonushka. Wouldn’t you want to swap it for something bigger?”
“Why?”
“So you could have two rooms, even if they’re smaller, but at least two. It would be better for you and Roman if each of you had your own space.”
“We’re not in trouble, why would we need separate spaces?”
“Oh, you are something!” laughed Anna Vasilyevna. “Right, who needs to sit in corners?”
The conversation ended there. Alyona wasn’t planning on selling the apartment; they were fine with their one-bedroom with a spacious kitchen.
It was in this kitchen that Alyona was preparing the table for her 31st birthday celebration.
She didn’t enjoy cooking but tried to do her best for the guests. Her mother, mother-in-law, and friend were expected to arrive. Her fiancé had already come home from work and brought a bouquet.
At the set time, the guests sat at the table, and the mother-in-law raised her glass.
“Here’s to our Alyonushka. You can see you’re trying, but you’re still inexperienced. Here’s a gift for you: a book on housekeeping,” she handed Alyona a “tome” that had probably been gathering dust in her closet for many years. “Very useful. I used it myself to learn how to take care of my husband. It has tips on shirts, how to make Olivier salad, and how to properly set a table…”
“Oh, thank you so much. This is exactly what I wanted,” Alyona pretended to be pleased with the gift and placed it on the table.
“So, dear, don’t put pickles in the Olivier…” The future mother-in-law started criticizing the salad and decided to elaborate on it.
“You know, I found hundreds of recipes and chose one. It seems to have turned out okay,” Alyona defended herself.
“Yeah, it’s all tasty, Alyona,” her friend supported her.
“Well, I’m not saying it’s bad. But it could be tastier. Remember, Roma, the Olivier Natasha made? That time on the second day of your wedding…”
Roman raised his eyebrows. Memories related to his ex-wife weren’t the best thing to bring up on his future wife’s birthday.
“It was all neat, the vegetables were sliced carefully, ‘by the ruler.’ Of course, I’m not accusing you or comparing, you’re not a professional cook like Natasha.”
“Yes, let’s drink to the fact that our new is always better than the old,” Alyona’s mother raised her glass, trying to ease the tension.
That evening, the topic of ex-wives was dropped. And then, the long-awaited gift from Roman came. Roman, with a pleased look, reached into his pocket… and pulled out a certificate for a beauty salon.
“Oh…” Alyona couldn’t hold back a sigh of disappointment. But she quickly composed herself, waiting to see if there were more surprises to come. But she didn’t get anything else. The evening ended, the guests left, and the proposal never came. Alyona became so upset that she asked directly.
“For whom is this ring, Roman?”
“What ring?” he frowned.
“Do you have another woman?”
“What nonsense? No, of course not.”
“I saw a ring in your bag. In a velvet red box.”
“A…” Roman slapped his forehead. “That…”
“And for whom is it?”
“It’s for my mom. I bought it in advance, there are discounts right now… in the store. I just picked it up. Her anniversary is in a month and a half.”
“Got it…” Alyona was deeply disappointed.
“And you… thought it was for you?” Roman raised his eyebrows. “It’s for my mom’s anniversary, I, as a good son, need to buy a nice gift. A valuable one…”
“Well, of course. I’m 31, not 50,” Alyona quietly said and went to the bedroom.
Roman realized why Alyona was upset. So, to avoid making her more upset, he called after her:
“We’ll go to the jewelry store and buy you a ring… If you want.”
“Really?!” Alyona seemed to not hear the end of the sentence.
“Yeah…”
“Then let’s go. I want to go today.”
It was already 9 p.m., just an hour before the malls closed. When they rushed into the store, it was almost 10.
“We need a ring!” Alyona shouted right away.
Roman pointed to a similar one to the one he bought for his mom, only with a zircon and much cheaper, but Alyona wasn’t in the mood for arguing.
“What size do you need?” the saleswoman asked. Roman stared at Alyona, and she extended her ring finger.
“This one for me.”
That’s when Roman realized there was no avoiding the wedding. However, he had already been thinking that their relationship would get there sooner or later, so he didn’t want to upset Alyona again. He bought her the ring that fit her finger and was affordable for him.
“Mom, Roma gave me a ring!” she happily told her mother that same evening. Then she called her friend to show off her new ring. After receiving congratulations, she posted a photo of the ring on social media to stop her colleagues from bothering her at work.
Now, Alyona was no longer the “long-overdue” single woman.
That was enough for her. She didn’t even push Roman with questions like, “When’s the wedding?” They continued living together, occasionally hosting her mother-in-law and mother.
When Anna Vasilyevna saw the ring, she shook her head.
“If you want to be a good wife, you need to learn how to cook properly. What’s in your fridge? Pizza?”
“We came home late from work, so we didn’t have the energy to cook,” Alyona explained.
“Natasha always had time for lunch and dinner.”
“Natasha is a cook. It would be weird…”
“Still, Roman always had neat shirts, and what’s this?” the mother-in-law pointed to the clothes rack.
“That’s a steamer, Anna Vasilyevna. I steam clothes after washing.”
“You need to iron with an iron!”
“Okay, I’ll listen to you next time.”
That answer offended Anna Vasilyevna, and she scolded her son.
“Buy your lady an iron. Or she’ll be walking around like a homeless person. Or you can bring me the laundry. I’ll iron it properly.”
Without a second thought, Roman gave his mother the shirts. He didn’t want to buy an iron.
When Alyona found out that her husband secretly gave the laundry to his mother, she threw a tantrum.
“Why don’t you just give her your underwear too and let her rinse it out!”
“And what’s the problem? She’s my mom.”
“She shouldn’t be involved in our household!”
“Then do everything yourself.”
“I am, but she doesn’t like it! She keeps comparing me to your Natasha!”
“Natasha was a good housewife, there’s a lot to learn from her.”
“Well, then go to Natasha! I’m not keeping you!” Alyona screamed, immediately regretting it. She didn’t want to lose Roman over something as silly as his shirts. And Roman didn’t want to lose Alyona either. She was a convenient option for him: apartment, food, stable “marital services.” So he immediately started apologizing.
“Alyona, I’m sorry. I think we should get married soon. And I’ll talk to my mom.”
They made up. Everything went back to normal. Anna Vasilyevna came over less often, but whenever she did, she found something to complain about, comparing Alyona to his ex-daughter-in-law. Apparently, Roman’s conversation with her didn’t help. That’s when Alyona came up with a plan. She found Natasha on the internet and sent her a simple message.
“Hi. I want to learn a few cool recipes from you. Will you teach me?”
“Hi. Come to my bakery today. We’ll chat,” Natasha replied.
And Alyona went.
She didn’t immediately reveal her plans, and Natasha pretended not to recognize her as the new fiancée of her ex-husband.
“I’m just launching my cooking blog. I want to teach girls how to cook,” Natasha said. “You’ll be my guinea pig. I won’t take any money; we’ll film content and post it on social media. That’ll be your payment. Your help and work for the blog.”
“I’d love to. I agree.”
Natasha and Alyona got along well.
“Why cooking?”
“I want to prove to my mother-in-law that I can do something… Honestly, she’s getting on my nerves.”
“Yeah? With what?”
“She compares me… to…” Alyona almost blurted out “to you,” but quickly stopped herself. “To the ex-wife of my fiancé.”
“Really? My ex-mother-in-law compared me too.”
“With who?” Alyona gasped.
“With everyone. With Roman’s ex-girlfriend, who always brought a cake. And with herself because I don’t bake fish right. And with the neighbor who never fries with coconut oil! Anna Vasilyevna is like that. That’s why we got divorced.”
“And Roman said you were different.” Alyona muttered.
“Yes. But opposites attract.”
“Exactly.”
“They’re usually only pushed apart by one thing: what’s against them. Like a mother-in-law.”
The ladies looked at each other.
“And what should we do?”
“Choose. If you love him, bear it. If you don’t, leave before the wedding.”
“Maybe I need to think about it,” Alyona said.
While she was thinking, Roman said that Anna Vasilyevna wanted to celebrate her anniversary at home.
“Will you help mom set the table? I told her you’re taking cooking courses, but she didn’t believe me.”
Alyona didn’t answer. She texted Natasha, who gave her an idea. That evening, Alyona called her mother-in-law and said she’d take care of preparing dinner for the celebration.
“Yeah? Well, if you can handle it yourself, I won’t argue. My hands have gotten so dry. And my nails are brittle. But you’re young, healthy. Cook, in general. I’ll send you the list of dishes and the number of guests. We’ll celebrate at your place so we don’t have to haul food from house to house.”
“Okay.” Alyona nodded.
That very day, she and Natasha worked hard.
“Here, take this cake in the box, and tell them you made the other one yourself,” Natasha said, handing over two bags.
“Thanks, Nat. You’re a wonderful friend.”
They hugged.
Of course, no one invited Natasha. But she was on standby. Alyona specifically recorded a few of Anna Vasilyevna’s comments about how good Roman’s ex-wife used to cook, unlike her, and how she compared Alyona to her.
“Don’t mind it, sis, this is our Alyona who hasn’t learned to slice bread. Natasha, though…”
“She wasn’t just ‘was.’ She still is and will be,” Alyona corrected her. “And I didn’t slice the bread. I bought it pre-sliced.”
“Spending money on nonsense! Why didn’t you buy a regular one? Too lazy to slice?”
“Yeah, Anna Vasilyevna, I was lazy.”
“You see how she talks? Young and rude like a tank. A snake, not a girl!” Anna Vasilyevna muttered quietly, but Alyona heard her and understood she’d done the right thing.
At the table, Anna Vasilyevna’s relatives were present—10 people, each of whom commented that the table was nicely set and everything was tasty, but the birthday girl kept finding something to criticize, even pulling a hair out of some salad!
“Well, well… Natasha wouldn’t have allowed that!” she said.
“Any, are you still talking about your ex-daughter-in-law?” her sister asked.
“Yes, it’s a pity they divorced.”
“Mom!” Roman realized the conversation had taken the wrong turn. Silence fell over the table.
“What mom? I’m just speaking honestly. Alyona’s not bad, but she’s nothing like Natasha. If only she could cook meat so it’s tender, not like shoe leather…”
“Maybe you’d prefer some cake then? I tried…” Alyona brought over the box with the “homemade” cake.
“Well, let’s see…” Anna Vasilyevna cut a piece and grimaced. “You’re really trying to make my blood sugar spike! Why so much jam?! No, I’m not eating this. Son, get the store-bought cake.”
Roman obediently brought the same cake, only packed in a plastic container. And Anna Vasilyevna, in her irritation, didn’t even realize she was cutting the same cake.
“Now, this I understand. Just the right amount of sweetness. Try it,” she handed her sister a spoon. But even the sister looked at Anna Vasilyevna in surprise.
“Any, the cakes are identical…”
“How’s that possible?!” the birthday girl exploded.
“Just like this. This cake was bought at Natalia’s bakery, your former daughter-in-law’s. And this one was bought there too. She baked both cakes.” Alyona said, looking at Anna Vasilyevna.
She froze.
“Don’t believe me? Here’s the sticker on the box. And on the container. Identical. And yes, I took cooking courses with Natasha to please you. And she recorded a greeting for you,” Alyona turned on her phone with a video message from Natasha.
“Anna Vasilyevna, darling! How nice to hear such kind words about me, because I’ve only ever heard nasty things from you. But you’ve always been inconsistent, haven’t you? If you liked my cooking, why didn’t you praise it before? Or did your principles get in the way? Anyway, today, the table was set by me. So, you can’t criticize Alyona for bad food. She didn’t cook anything. So, happy birthday. I wish you less poison. They say it shortens life,” Natasha raised her glass in the video and took a gulp. Then she waved her hand and turned off the video.
Alyona clapped and removed her apron. And Anna Vasilyevna turned pale.
“Was there poison in the cake?!”
“No, Natasha and I might be snakes, but we’re not that poisonous,” Alyona laughed. “And here’s another gift for you,” she took off the ring and handed it to Roman.
“What’s this, Alyona?”
“Give it to your mom. She deserves two right away.”
Roman gritted his teeth.
“So, no wedding?” his mother rubbed her hands together. She’d already been preparing to “re-educate” her new daughter-in-law. She liked how Alyona responded to her comments, but only until Alyona started to fight back.
“No. There will be no wedding.” Alyona said and left. She lost her fiancé but gained a new hobby and a new friend. They started a joint blog called “Mother-in-law Won’t Like It,” and it went viral! Meanwhile, Anna Vasilyevna remained with Roman. A son at his mother’s side—that’s what women’s happiness means.
